A Perfect Morning

At least, it is, for me.

I wish it goes on forever.

Old Me Hold Me

Yesterday night I’ve made such a wrong, wrong decision. At noon I and my friends met and we switched some photo files of our trip to Yogya back then. When I rechecked them again at home, I’m checking other old photos as well, thinking that it will bring back lots of good memories but hell how I was so wrong.

Most of the photos that I managed to go through with were the photos I took back then in Japan, both when I did some traveling alone or together with my friends.

I’m just amazed that how can I laugh so sincerely, considering how shitty my days back then.

My often solo trip to One Piece Museum, which I've been eyeing for for forever. 

Strolling around Harajuku with my friend, Shelley, whom I missed so much.

Disneyland. Shelley. Argh.

Damn happy skinny bitch. Not my boyfriend fyi.

Gunma with this guy. Not my boyfriend also. At some point I wish, tho.

Korea, alone.

Hongkong, alone as well. Crayzy bithz is cray.

The more I browse some photos the more frustrated I've become.

I think I’m just missing my old, carefree self, that’s all. And I pitied myself for this.

Considering I’m gonna be in my end of 20s now, it’s just that being “carefree” comes with a lot of responsibilities afterwards.

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“I want to travel somewhere far away; however I need to save as well.”

“I want to quit my work and try to do some new things, however in my age right now I’m not in a place where I can be “explorative” anymore.”

“I’m ok with being single and carefree however somehow I need to settle down at one point, at least for the sake of my parents.”

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These excuses have never been in my head when I’m on my early 20s, however lately these thoughts start to creep in and somehow I have no power to fight them. I feel like I ran out of time.

Somehow I wonder if anyone’s feel the same…

And I Will Call You By Mine.

Watched a movie, and SUPER hooked.

Great great great movie, 10/10. How can I knew this movie just now??

Hands down, Timothee Chalamet and Armie Hammer successfully melt me down with their acting, and thumbs up as well for Luca Guadagnino as the director and most of all, Andre Aciman as the author of the novel (yes, it IS adapted from a novel). Genius.

Looking from the poster, you guys may have guessed, that....YES, this movie is rotating around romance between 2 guys. I'm not a pro-LGBTQ however this movie were SO GOOD that you kinda fall in love with them falling in love, with the chemistry between them, and with all the meaning they deliver. 

After the movie ended, I feel like I've just watched.. an art.

Every picture is a painting.

Is it better to speak, or to die?

Every scenario is a poetry.

I'm in love.

Pro tip though: not a with-the-whole-family watch material as there were some very awkward scenes inside.. 

But do watch them! 

I'm not gonna spill the summary here as it will be too long (do your own homework if you're interested) however here is the website that I found which explains some meanings inside some scenes in the movie; which blows me on. 

All in all, it is one of the movie which makes me feel shitty for several days, in a good way, of course.

All the pain, worth it.

Will try to get the book as well; if the movie were THAT GOOD, how will the novel be?

Super excited!

Will keep you posted and see you on the next one :)

*just a foot note that all pictures above were not mine.

H A P P Y

Just realized this morning that I’ve only had 2 posts on my 2018 blog archive, and it saddened me a bit because I remember that each week of 2018, I kept reminding myself to update my blog frequently however I seem can’t find even a just a little time to do this. I realize that my blog has not been my priority, at least until now.

Just recently I really miss writing some thoughts in my not-so-secret blog; a place to keep my memories present in a web somewhere where people can also enjoy what I’m feeling about. Being vlogger or youtuber seems to be more promising these days however blogging will always be my sanity place, where I can keep ranting and talking via keyboard and keep me mentally stable.

But now welcoming 2019, I think I will start to write again, somehow. To remind myself that my blog is all compilations of what I truly enjoy and makes me happy, and updating it makes me happy. 

Happiness even from the simplest form.

Just like this socks that I wore this morning.

From the book that I’ve read: The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin, she said that one way to make yourself happy is to spend – money-wise, can be - but more of like, use all the cute notes that you keep tucking away for collections, all the nice accessories that you saved for “later”, postcards which were usually kept on the folder, and so on.

Those things make you happy, so why not use it?

- and so I’ve thought this morning.

So I decided to use my Totoro socks that my brother gave me months ago – which I’ve been saving for “later”.

To a happier me, and no more "later", in 2019.